Am I Good Enough? Building Our Self Worth
Whether you are a teenager or an adult there are moments we ask am I good enough? We second-guess ourselves, doubt our decisions and feel insecure on the inside, the outside or both. But it is important that we work at building our self-worth. Valuing ourselves and having a strong belief in who we are and the decisions we make is so important.
Technology and social media have made it even harder in this day and age to believe in ourselves. We are constantly comparing ourselves to someone else, comparing our life with theirs and the things that they own. We look at the glossy pictures and how the person looks and place great importance on it. There are constant feelings that our lives aren’t good enough or perhaps we are not good enough. It puts expectations on what we think we need or want.
Building our self-worth is not about inflating our ego, or thinking that we are better than someone else. It is not about climbing over other people to get higher on the ladder rung. It is about focussing on us and what we are good at. Believing in ourselves and all that we are capable of.
We need to stop focussing on everyone else and focus on ourselves.
In building our self-worth we need to understand that we all have a lot to offer and it is different for every one person. We should not keep asking am I good enough? Good enough for who! To believe in yourself gives you the chance to understand your strengths and what you can achieve. You can see what you are capable of. It gives you the confidence to work through a multitude of situations and try harder, or pick yourself up and try again.
There are so many factors that affect our self-worth. The people around us can heavily influence us in how we feel about ourselves. Are you placing too much emphasis on what other people think? I know that I can worry sometimes too much what others are thinking of me. Sometimes we worry about trying something new or we think that skills or tasks we do are not performed well enough. We often doubt ourselves before we have even given ourselves a chance to give it a go!
So how do we stop asking am I good enough?
How do we go about building our self-worth?
Change Our Self-Talk
The most important factor is ourselves. The way we self-talk or prepare ourselves for situations is so important. If we already doubt ourselves then we are doomed before we start. Believing in your abilities is vital. Accepting that if we fail, it doesn’t matter because we tried. Understanding that sometimes things don’t work out and that is okay. How we prepare ourselves mentally for these situations will determine how we feel about it moving forward. Instead of saying “everyone thinks I am an idiot” replace it with “I have so many wonderful people around me who love me”. Instead of saying “I am not sure I can do this”, replace it with “I am proud of myself that I am giving it a go and no matter the outcome, I tried my best.”
It is really hard with social media to stop comparing ourselves to everything that we see. We constantly compare our bodies, our faces, our friends, our lifestyle, our holidays. You name it! But we need to stop. In order to keep building our self-worth, we need to focus on what we have and tell ourselves that this is good enough! Where we are is where we are meant to be. I try to take nice photos for Instagram and Facebook and I know it takes effort!! I can’t imagine all the setting up and logistics of setting up some of the photos I see! I would never get anything done! We are so quick to be critical of ourselves.
We need to appreciate all that we are and all that we have and stop believing that we should be a certain way. This behaviour can end up being very destructive so it is important to proud and acknowledge our own achievements and abilities. And accepting some more wrinkles too!
We are good enough!
Set A Positive Tone Each Day
Start each day on a positive note by setting yourself up with positive messages. Change it daily or every few days. There are loads of motivational apps or just simply google quotes or images of something you are focussing on. Often you can come up with some inspirational quotes for different subjects. For example, if you do a search for quotes on self-worth you will come up with heaps. Use these as a source of inspiration each day and focus on that. Keep reminding yourself throughout the day of that message. It could be something about general happiness, or you could be working towards something. Starting positively in the morning gets your mind on the right track. If things go wrong, which they do, just quickly remind yourself again. Breathe and work out how to move forward. And remember to tell yourself you can do it!
This is definitely easier said than done. I have had times in my life where I have worried and stressed about the outcomes of certain situations or reactions to people I have had to deal with. The best way is to stop worrying and just focus on the here and now. Focus on what you can control, which is you. It is easy to get ahead of ourselves and think too far into the future but we can’t control other people and how they choose to act. We also can’t control what happens in the future. We can only control how we act so we should put one foot in front of the other and stay focused and confident in our own actions.
Sometimes just hanging out with girlfriends or friends is enough of a boost to our self-worth. Good friends and a good laugh often leave us feeling better. Having time to ourselves and doing activities that we enjoy can really make us feel good about ourselves. Exercising can also give us a great endorphin rush that can really help with our confidence and self-worth. Challenge yourself to try something a little harder or walk a little further. It doesn’t matter what the size of the challenge is, achieving something even small is something to be proud of! If you are stuck for ideas for taking time out for yourself, check out my ideas for daily self-care inspiration here. If you need some more ideas for workout motivation head over here.
So how about this week you and me both work on building our self-worth. Let’s stop asking ourselves am I good enough? This week we are going to appreciate all the amazing qualities that we have and all that we are capable of. Let’s build ourselves back up because no one else is going to do it for us.